Monday, February 14, 2011

Picture This: Day 18

('My Insecurities' by Cheryl McLaughlin)
Day 18:
A picture of your biggest insecurity.
For me it is hard to pinpoint my biggest insecurity. I have moments of it everyday. Sometimes reoccurring thoughts that I have carried with me from adolescence, sometimes over things that I have encountered only since becoming a full fledged adult. I figure, for those at my age, that is probably how it goes for most.
When I was younger I was consumed by my insecurities. I hated my body, my face, my voice. I felt like I was a spazz and as long as I kept my mouth closed nothing stupid sounding could come out of it. I never kept my mouth shut and in turn constantly felt embarrassed of what came out of it.
As an adult, I love myself much more than I did then. I am chunky but don't feel disgusted by seeing my body in the mirror. I can hold a conversation and walk away feeling as if a stream of words flew out that were actually understandable to other people.
Because I couldn't think of an appropriate picture to illustrate 'insecurity', I took to Google to help me out. When I typed in 'insecurity' the above pic was one of the first to show up. It is sad to me (only because I struggled with it for so long myself) that insecurity is most identified with body image. As clich├ęd as it might sound, I hope one day we can determine how we feel about someone by the ideas that they bring to the table and not by how they look like.

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